Saturday, February 7, 2009

My name is Kelly, and I'm a Mountain Dewaholic...

Sometime before the ice storm happened I mentioned that I was going to have Lapband surgery. Well, I finally had my office consult with the surgeon this week and he says it looks like I'll be ready for surgery in as little as 8 weeks as long as my insurance cooperates. He only had one concern from all the questionnaires I had filled out in his office...what kind of sugary beverage was I consuming "several" glasses of daily??

I told him Mt. Dew and watched his eyes roll. For those who don't know about the deliciousness that is Mt. Dew, let me explain it. Mt. or Mountain Dew (if you have time to type it out) is a southern concoction owned by the Pepsi people with more sugar and caffeine in it than basically any other carbonated beverage. It's also been the love of my food-life and bane of my weight-existence since I was a kid.

When he learned that Mt. Dew was my weakness, my doctor flatly informed me that I had to give them up IMMEDIATELY. He even told me that if he found out that I was still drinking them up to the time of my surgery, he would NOT perform the surgery. He was that serious about it. No more Mt. Dews, or any other carbonated beverages...ever. The theory is that the carbonation in sodas (or pops for you northern folks) makes your stomach expand and messes up your appetite and could displace the Lapband, thus irritating and annoying your surgeon profusely when he has to go back in and fix it...

I'm okay with doing away with every other soda...I'm very happy with unsweet tea. It's what I drink at all restaurants and most of the time at home. I don't like any other soda except Mt. Dew...but my like of Mt. Dew borders on obsession. To badly quote Twilight, Mt. Dew is my "exact brand of heroin". How sad is that?? I can understand an obsession with cheesecake or Snickers love for chicken nachos is pretty strong...but giving up Mt. Dew makes me want to cry. Seriously.

My mother drinks Dr. Pepper and my dad was a Pepsi fan, but from a very young age I can remember begging them to buy me Mt. Dew. I would have always rather had water than any other soda. I will turn my nose up at the rest of them. I have no idea what it is about Mt. Dew that I has sugar, but so do all the other has caffeine, but so does iced tea. I don't get it, but if I've had a bad day or I'm under stress, a nice cold 20 oz. serving of the yellow green (I'll admit it looks like pee) stuff makes me feel better. It's my ultimate comfort food and it isn't even a food. The first thing I do when I arrive at work in the morning is take a sip from a Mt. Dew. They can bombard me with all the paperwork and drama and craziness all long as I have a Mt. Dew to smooth it over. It's also the first thing I want in the morning...just like that first cigarette of the morning that my mom used to talk about.

I know I have to give them up. I haven't had one since my doctor told me not to, and I won't have one. I really want this surgery to work. I probably won't really miss them until Monday morning at work. That's when it will hit me. If my mom can quit actual addiction...then surely I can quit my favorite soda. Right? Of course I can...

Wish me luck.


Laoch of Chicago said...

I had to give all sodas up which was depressing and now mostly drink Iced Tea wit splenda or truvia. Eventually you get used to it but it takes a long time.

Bear down, it is a worthy quest

Shana said...

My name is Shana and I am a diet Cokeaholic.

Good luck with it!!!

(I love the Mountain Dew commercials around here- A guy ski down a hill with the song "GIve me a Mountain with nothing to Dew!"

Maria said...

I have never had Mt. Dew. I just can't get past the color. After hearing of its addictive properties, I think I'm glad.

Good luck!

Anonymous said...

Ahhhhh yes, Mt. Dew - the crystal meth of softdrinks. Ha! I think I'm in denial about cokes (southern term for all things carbonated). I never have been a fan of the Dew, though. I say I could live without cokes, but I'll go a few months without one and then when I do suck one down it is with orgasmic pleasure. Ha!

I'm excited for you about the surgery!

Jane! said...

Good luck with that!
I stepped myself down to Diet Dew a few years back but haven't been able to totally kick the habit.
I LOVES my dew!
Sounds like it will be worth it,though?

Becca said...

I like diet lime coke and I am not ready to give that up even though I get the lecture from the mother in law every time she sees me. Ugh.

Nadine Hightower said...

Mine is DrPepper.

Good Luck.

Jeankfl said...

I'm with Nadine.. Mine is Dr. Pepper. They'll have to pry it out of my cold, dead, hands.. Good luck Monday!! And every day after that! I know you can do it, if you really want to.