Welcome to my World...

We interrupt this blog to bring you Arkansas winter weather. There is a 30% chance of light sleet forecasted for later tonight, therefore every school, business, church and doctor's office should cease all activities and people should run panicked to their cars immediately. At this point, hightail it to the nearest grocery store. Every attempt should be made to wipe clean the shelves at Walmart Supercenter. No gallon of milk must be left when you are finished. Seriously, you may be stranded for up to a day in your home. You will starve unless you buy at least $100 worth of bread,eggs and toilet paper. Then commence to your vehicles and drive one of two ways: slow as Christmas or faster than a speeding bullet. Make sure to use absolutely no common sense while driving. Finally, cloister yourself in your home...turn on the Weather Channel...and wait for your children to be hastily let out of school amid widespread chaos and panic (but only after 1pm, so that the school board can count it as a full day and get their money). Enjoy your time off by attempting to make a snowman using only a 1/8 inch layer of ice from your driveway, since that's all you have. Do not leave your home until the temperature warms up to 50 degrees...which is forecasted tomorrow. Thank you for tuning in and be sure to watch the continuous scroll of closings at the bottom of your screen...